The Daily Fail reported yesterday that god-fearing Bono, self-appointed Goodest of Do-Gooders and all-round dullard, was caught 'carousing' with two teenage girls in St Tropez. Here are the pictures they ran, which accompanied a rather lurid article in which the phrase 'family man' was used to great effect:

And:

I mean, ewww, gross. Apparently the one on the right is a man what is called Simon Carmody. He is an Irish too but we know nothing about him other than that the shirt he is wearing is hideous, and he has shit hair, a la Nicky Haslam.

Anyway apart from making us do a sick in our mouth, these pictures also made us think about vampires. And so we did this:

And this:

As a result we felt much, much better. You know, photoshonk is a very effective form of occupational therapy at times, and this was one such occasion.

Read the full horror here.