Who Is The Scariest Witch Doctor In Pop?

By Wendy Roby

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Readers, if you knew us, you would have already heard our theory about the increasing Mighty Booshisisation of music, and how they are having a strange influence on everything from crap cardboard aesthetics in promos to the alarmingly frequent croppings-up of people in skellington suits (quick shout-out here for anyone who says skellington rather than skeleton - do you know what, WELOVEYOU).

Anyway, while it would be undoubtedly brilliant to know us / have heard this theory ['No, it would not, you are well annoying' - Our Friends] there is a more pressing question. And that is, which of the following voodoo people in Pop slash 'dance' are the most frightening?

First off, Esser, who you will remember in his video for Satisfied (which was very good, btw, just not as good as I Love You, which was 1000000xAMAZING) had a voodoo keyboard player, as well as donning a skellington suit himself at one point. Look:

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Then we have Drums of Death. Also 10000000xAMAZING (if not 10000000000000, readers, he is that good), he likes to go on stage looking like this:

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Which, as we have already mentioned, is actually quite sexy. Ooo. Would you trust this man with your health and safety? No, you would not.

Anyway, now - like, as of today - we have Dan Black. Who in the mazin new video for Alone (what has loads of slap bass on it but is SHOCK not ruined by the same) has also gone to the dark side. See here, chaps:

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AND

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So, question. Who is the scariest? We put each of their heads on to a picture of a cute kitten to find out. And can now exclusively reveal that...

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